And shift in personality comes on 3…2…1…

I really should stop staying up late at night because it’s too unhealthy and I am fully aware of it, but meh, let me indulge myself for the 360th day in my year. And just so we’re clear with each other, self, here’s what you’re missing out by writing this blog post:


2. Waking up earlier and getting a head start on all the work you need to finish before school starts.

3. Clearer and younger-looking skin

4. Less-enormous eye bags

5. Not having a mild throbbing pain in your head for the rest of the day.

6. Not having to take a nap right after lunch

7. A faster metabolism

8. Less stress, depressing thoughts, and daunting realizations in your 17 years of existence

9. Being unaware of the dreams you will never turn into realities

10. A whole lot more that you should just make a separate blog post about…

My period is over, but damn, I am so emotional I even cried about that video for SP 126. Okay so it was the beautiful piano music in the background and not the story, which I dutifully replaced with my own masterpiece playing inside my head (what, life should come with it’s own background music and handsome, charming, leading men, glamorous lifestyle, and wonderful locations for people like me, but I take what I can get).

Sure two nights ago I was cheerful and stuff, but oh god am I a downer now. I’m just so upset about how Christmas of 2009 and 2010 I was spending it so happy, loved, and fulfilled more than ever in my young life with someone, and here I am in 2012 so alone. I mean, I sort of choose to be alone because I never cling to other people (a.k.a. my friends) as much as I’d need to get rid of this feeling of  utter solitude, but hey, alone is alone.

And I’m tired of feeling happy or angry, time to feel a little sad and gloomy once in a while, although it’s never good for me. Why am I such a masochist? Maybe because I have the emotional range of a teaspoon (ha-ha, Hermione) and I need to exhaust that to its maximum of three emotions, even if the third one only comes during my PMS and the holidays.

Oh Pat, fine, indulge yourself with your endless self-pity.


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